Who Should You be Writing For?

Hey there, friends!

I have recently been going through a period where I’ve been very hard on myself about this blog. I wasn’t entirely sure what direction I wanted it to take, and ultimately, I ended up feeling like I should be posting what people wanted to see instead of what I truly felt inspired to write. And that really defeats the purpose of blogging, right? I have my own unique voice, so why would I try to mimic other blogs? This blog is not going to be exactly like those other lifestyle blogs out there, because I’m an aquarius, a free spirit, and stubborn.

Instead of worry about what I think others should be expecting from me, I should focus on the kind of content I would want to read as a consumer. No, I don’t want to read about the same sort of lifestyle over and over again. I want to read experiences that I relate to. But it’s difficult to be consistent with something like that when you are, yourself, inconsistent. But I suppose that is one of those life lessons I have to overcome if I ever want to be successful in life. I have a real problem with finding and using my voice.

If you create a certain type of content that readers love, and then stray from that to create something else you fancy, will your readers stay? It’s a difficult thing to approach, but I suppose one must ask themselves who they write for. And the answer in my case should be, I write for me. And the readers who it resonates with will stay, and those who do not relate to it will leave, and it’s as simple as that.

How many bloggers or writers out there feel pressured, once you find a reader base, to produce things based on what they want as opposed to what you feel like writing? Is that comparable to sacrificing your voice for your business or brand? Or is it an inevitable thing that every creator faces?


Tarot Spread To Get Over An Ex

Hey there, friends!

Today I would like to share with you a tarot spread that I developed in early February to help me make sense of my recent breakup. I was finding it difficult to move on from my partner, as many people do after breaking up with someone they care for. As an Aquarius, I have an innate and insatiable desire to understand things. I kept asking myself why, why, why about everything that happened and why it didn’t work out. I couldn’t let the issue drop until I fully wrapped my mind around the understanding and closure of the situation. This tarot spread was a result of me asking a series of questions I wanted the answers to, and in this way, I developed a spread.

Note: Of course I take the tarot messages as advice, but also with a grain of salt. Keep that in mind when dealing with outside parties, and always remember to be respectful of a partner’s decision if they choose to end things. If the cards send a message of reconciliation, please do not take this as validation to insert yourself back into their lives and become an emotional burden. I did this spread for myself, so that I could heal and work through things in my own mind, completely separate from my partner. Do this spread to improve yourself and your own mental stability and healing.

Also, don’t mind the bent page. I crinkled it while erasing the pencil and it’s been bugging the heck out of me!

So let’s jump into the spread.

1-3: Why it didn’t work out.

This is the root of the problem/situation. This represents things that may have been out of balance in the relationship or the underlying disconnect between you.

4-6: Why I can’t move on.

These cards represent anything that you are holding onto, emotional ties between you and your partner, hopes and fears, wishes, and internal conflict that is burdening your mind post split.

7-9: Next steps in my healing process.

These cards represent what you should be focusing on, what you should be releasing, and your next steps moving forward with your own life when you are feeling lost, attached, or abandoned/lonely.

10: Something I need to know about my ex partner.

This card represents some hidden aspect of your former partner that was never brought to light. This can also represent how they are currently feeling, or the root of a deep conflict or struggle in their own life, although you can take this card to mean just about anything relating to your ex. Whatever it is you need to know about them.

11: How I viewed the relationship.

How you felt about the relationship, your feelings towards your partner, and the overall energy that you brought to the relationship.

12: How they viewed the relationship.

How your partner felt about the relationship, their feelings towards you, and the overall energy that they brought to the relationship.

13: How they viewed me.

How your partner viewed you during the relationship. This could represent strengths or weaknesses they recognized in you, or the general energy they felt from you.

14: How they viewed themselves.

How your partner viewed themselves during the relationship. This could represent strengths or insecurities about themselves, whether they felt justified in their decisions, or the general energy they felt they brought to the relationship. This could also represent deeper personal struggles or images of self-worth.

15-17: Future relations or outcome between us.

These cards represent the future of your interaction with this person. Did things end well? Is there any chance of talking to them again? Are they satisfied with their decision? How are they feeling now? How are you feeling now? These cards can also indicate your ex partner’s next moves in the near future. Or yours.

And there you have it. If you use this spread please let me know how it resonated with you. I’d love to hear from you in the comments or posts!

Take care!

How To Dress For Success On A Budget

Hey there, friends!

They always say you should dress for the profession you want. Well, I don’t know what that says about me, as I wear around a Wednesday Addams inspired black dress with white flies embroidering it, but I certainly know that a killer outfit does wonders for your confidence and work ethic. When you wear the clothes that you feel truly express your personal style, it’s easy to shine a little brighter knowing that you look amazingly unique.

But often the problem of affordability arises. Sure, it’s nice to buy new things and improve your wardrobe, but who has that kind of money when you are also trying to support yourself, or a family, on a budget? I am in no way a fashion guru, but somehow I manage to muddle my way through the fashion world with my pittance, and so today I would like to share with you some of my tips on how I remain fashionable in a world of expensive fashion trends!

A List of Very Obvious Tips Because I am a Simple Woman

Drug Store Makeup | I know every rants and raves about high end makeup. At various points of my past, I too got caught up in the craze of luxury make up trends. However, you have to ask yourself…is expensive makeup really any better than drug store makeup? I mean, it gets the same job done, and considering you only end up wearing it for a day or a night, does it really need to be top of the line? Here’s the thing: One of the most gorgeous girl’s I know always used to have flawless makeup. Her wings were always on point, her red lips were impeccably lined and painted, but when I went shopping with her, I realized that she didn’t buy the expensive stuff. Her secret? All of her makeup was the cheap stuff from CVS or Rite Aid! Knowing this, I felt more comfortable about purchasing my E.L.F. makeup online because I knew that it didn’t matter the quality of the product, what mattered was that I liked it and thought it made me look pretty. It’s all about finding the colors that match your skin tone and learning how to apply it correctly. The quality of the product? Only an afterthought to me now.

Thrift Stores | Yep, thrifting is super trendy right now, but I’m totally on board with this craze. You’d be amazed at what gems lie hidden within the racks of your local thrift store. If you have a free day, it’s fun to store hop, hitting up multiple locations from different areas. Not only can you find clothes, but just about anything else you could want as well. I found some gorgeous flower pots at thrift stores, and my friend who just moved into his new apartment found a complete set of glasses for his kitchen for $12! It can be time consuming and tedious to hunt for thrifts though, so make sure you eat a nice breakfast and go when you are feeling full of energy, or else it can all be a bit overwhelming. I also heard of a great tip for anyone who travels. On vacation, if you go to a place where high fashion rules, be sure to hit up their thrift stores. You can find great deals on luxury fashion, and even if you don’t end up wearing it yourself, the resale value might be well worth it! (Of course that gets into a fine science of researching reselling, which is a whole other can of worms). One of the items that I find is most prominent at thrift stores is professional clothing; suit jackets, slacks, pumps. Anything you could need for an interview! And don’t forget the biggest thrift store of all: Ebay.

Shop Sales | This one probably goes without saying, but I constantly check out the sale sections of my favorite stores. At the end of every season they will put up some great products when they are clearing out their warehouses and you can find great deals. And if I see an item that I want to buy online I will sit on it for a while to see if I can catch it on a sale. I’ve made it into a sort of game. It satisfies something primal in me like a predator hunting its prey. You wait until it’s weak and then you pounce! That flowered bra and panty set never had a chance. *Licks fingers after my fast clicking skills were put to good use*. Clearance racks at stores are also great, but again, it takes a lot of mental fortitude to sort through the jumble of sales items and white trash-ers wearing leggings that are two sizes to small for them who haven’t washed their hair in a few weeks because they use the “it’s unhealthy to wash your hair every day” as an excuse to be lazy and dirty, so prepare yourself emotionally before delving into that. I almost never buy anything full price these days. $70 for jeans? No thanks.

Friend Exchange | Have a friend who wears your size? Why not exchange clothes? It’s like having multiple wardrobes all in one! Of course for anyone who grew up with a sister, just suggesting the exchange of clothes is likely to trigger them into fits of rage from all those years of having their clothes stolen by their younger siblings. But hey, that’s in the past. We’re all (mostly, generally) adults now, and sharing is caring. Just make sure not to spill any clam sauce on Martha’s blue sweater or her mother is going to have a lot of questions for her daughter, and you’re gonna feel really bad about it when she is shipped off to a catholic school away from boys until she’s 18.

Department Stores | Ahhh, yes. Nothing says Hell like being confined inside the stuffy innards of a department store basement with cheap florescent lights beating down on your sweaty face to make you look like a blob-like life mass. I’ve often found myself in J. C. Penny questioning my life choices, but you know what? Sometimes there’s a golden lining to your suffering. You never know when you’ll find that gem of a black dress, or the perfect blouse to match that pair of khaki pants you can’t seem to wear with anything. I mean, you don’t have to publicly broadcast on snapchat that you’re making a trip to the dreaded department store, but that also means that no one will know you’re wearing a department store dress suit unless they are wearing the same one, and then you can both be ashamed of your terrible life choices as you sit there with fake smiles on and exchange an awkward “I like your suit”. I’m just kidding. Department stores aren’t that bad. It’s all about how you wear the pieces you find there in a fun and hip way. No one has to know where you bought it. Shhh.

So there you have it! Those are my tips on how I stay on top of my wardrobe in a world full of overpriced fashion. Do you guys have any tips for fellow readers on how you like to dress for success on a budget? I’d love to hear from you!

Have a super rad day and continue being awesome!

Sunday Pep Talk | Keep Going

You aren’t stupid. What you just wrote isn’t stupid. No one is going to think that it’s dumb, and if they do, who cares? They probably have nothing better to do than send rude comments online, which probably means they have no friends. (Just kidding, they probably have at least one friend).

Go ahead and publish that blog post you feel a little iffy about, or sit on in for a few more days until you can make it better, and then post it. Do you know how much content there is floating around online? I’m sure yours isn’t the worst blog post to ever be published. Not every post is going to be golden and get 1000 notes, but the effort you put in matters. Consistency matters. Your readers aren’t going to care that you’re posting about a topic that everyone and their mother has already posted about, as long as you approach the topic from your own unique perspective and add in your own witty humor and nice touches. People like to connect, and they like to connect with you, that’s why they follow you! So be yourself, use your own voice, and keep making content.

Success comes to those who stick with it and are true to their own voices. Don’t think so much about it, and don’t worry about every post being perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. Even your favorite bloggers sometimes post things to their blogs that they probably aren’t 100% proud of, but who cares? That particular post might speak to someone! You never know who you might impact.

So please don’t give up! Keep going!



One of my former employers once had an affair with one of his employees. He made no attempt to hide the relationship. He was so proud that he was able to ensnare such a young, vivacious spitfire with his money and power. Talk about a midlife crisis! The affair not only put stress on his marriage but tarnished his reputation as well. Of course, as a businessman, he recovered rather easily. And the girl moved to another state to work as a flight attendant and was never seen again. She vanished as quickly as she came, leaving a trail of bitter chaos behind her.

It ended horribly. Overcome with rage over the fact that she was threatening to leave him, he fired her. He did this in front of the entire staff at the end of a long day in an attempt to humiliate her. Words were exchanged, lividly from his lips and indifferently amused from hers. We watched in awesome horror as the scene unfolded in front of us all. I just wanted to grab my lunchbox and get the hell out of there.

His wife, in an attempt to win the affections of her husband back, or perhaps from pure sickness of heart, stopped eating. She lost so much weight that she looked close to death. At least that’s what we thought, until we discovered that she had cancer. Imagine getting that news along with finding out that there’s some young tramp walking around with your husband’s seed inside of her, the same seed that reared the children you bore and  have to look at every single day? I have mad respect for her for dealing with all of that and still having the strength of character to hold her head high. 

After their affair was finished and the girl was gone, my boss pined for her. Every day at work when things were slow and his mind wasn’t preoccupied with his job, he would stand and stare out the window. I remember one of those days, he said in a voice that seemed haunted, “God, I really miss her.” I could empathize with him in a way. Although I didn’t morally agree with what he had done, I knew that in his mind, he had loved her, and losing her meant losing a piece of himself and his identity. Or perhaps, as a man, it simply meant losing amazing orgasms…and really, isn’t that the same thing?

I’m joking, of course. Yes, men think an exorbitant amount about sex, but he had lost more than that. Some people enter into relationships and even affairs in order to connect with others. He lost a connection to a powerful spark of a human, and from experience, that can be one of the most painful things in the world. Sometimes it’s even more painful if you know in your heart that it’s a lie, or unsustainable, because lying to yourself makes you believe that things might turn out ok in the end. You get your hopes up, you start to believe the lie, and then when it inevitably comes to an end, you are left not only having been betrayed, but betraying yourself as well.

And really, what was he expecting? How long can an affair like that really go on? Was he planning on leaving his wife who had supported him through the years to marry this other girl who was full of life and years ahead of her? Would they move in together and argue over whose turn it was to buy the toothpaste? Was he planning to continue the love triangle until he was too old to get it up, when his balls were shriveled to the size of grapes? Sadly, some people think like this; completely selfishly. They want their cake and they want to eat it too. They want to stick their grubby fingers in all the pies. They want to take anything they can get as long as it makes them feel good, even if it’s only for one fleeting moment.

But in instances of infidelity, I don’t really think there are any winners. Someone will always end up getting hurt. I’m sure my boss still carries that hurt and a piece of her inside of him because those memories, good or bad, never really go away. As they say in Cowboy Bebop or that one song or whatever, you’re gonna carry that weight. 

I am


I Am, A Poem

I am a jazz heart, slow rainy rhythms and black silk stockings.

I am late night rendezvous, the girl you never get to know completely.

I am the sound of heels on cobbled streets, the flutter of fear before a first kiss.

I am steady logic, cold heart, warm hands; gentle eyes and big plans.

I am the bite of red wine.

I am the shadow thoughts. Insidious kindness.

I am dark ocean waves that carry the moon’s reflection no closer to shore.

I am purple orchids, pale lips, green eyes.

I am dark blue.

I am a winding line that snakes around the straight path.

I am cats claws hidden beneath soft paws.

I am melancholy.

I am the warm glow of a street light on empty city streets.

I am the skyline, peaceful until you get too close and begin to see all my cracks and crimes.

I am the scratch of a violin bow in the echoes of very old music halls that carry the ghosts of luxury within their walls.

I am watery and willowy, prismatic like the many edges of a diamond with too many sides.

I am dimly lit corridors that lead to intoxicating pleasures.

I am silent stares from across the room.

I am foundation; strong on my own, but incomplete.

I am quiet power.

I am.

Who are you?